Going Through Something: What Does It Mean in English?

Ernest Bio Bogore

Written by

Ernest Bio Bogore

Ibrahim Litinine

Reviewed by

Ibrahim Litinine

Going Through Something: What Does It Mean in English?

Communication transcends mere words—it's deeply embedded with cultural nuances and idiomatic expressions that carry implicit meaning. When someone says they're "going through something," the significance extends beyond the literal interpretation of moving through a physical space. This common English phrase encapsulates emotional journeys, personal challenges, and transformative experiences.

Let's dissect this seemingly simple expression to understand its varied applications, appropriate contexts, and the emotional weight it carries in everyday English conversation.

What Does "Going Through Something" Mean?

The phrase "going through something" serves as a versatile expression that depicts an individual experiencing a challenging period or significant life event. Unlike more direct statements about specific emotions, this phrase creates a deliberate ambiguity that allows people to acknowledge difficulty without immediately divulging details.

When broken down linguistically, "going through" implies an active process—a journey with a beginning, middle, and eventual end. This temporal dimension distinguishes it from expressions like "having a problem," which lack the inherent suggestion of progression and eventual resolution.

The expression typically indicates:

  1. A personal struggle that's currently impacting someone's life
  2. A transitional period involving emotional processing
  3. An experience that's demanding significant psychological resources
  4. A situation that may temporarily alter one's typical behavior or availability

The power of this phrase lies in its balanced acknowledgment of hardship while simultaneously implying forward movement—the person isn't static in their difficulty but moving through it, suggesting resilience and eventual emergence.

Common Situations Described as "Going Through Something"

The versatility of "going through something" spans various life circumstances. Understanding these contexts helps enhance comprehension of this idiomatic expression in real-world conversations.

Relationship Challenges

When applied to relationships, "going through something" often refers to:

  • Navigating conflict with a partner
  • Processing a breakup or divorce
  • Reconciling after betrayal
  • Questioning the future of a relationship
  • Adapting to relationship transitions (moving in together, engagement, etc.)

For example, if someone says, "Sarah and Michael are going through something right now," they're likely indicating that the couple is experiencing relationship turbulence without specifying the exact nature of their difficulties.

Professional Transitions

In work contexts, this phrase frequently describes:

  • Job loss or career changes
  • Workplace conflicts or ethical dilemmas
  • Overwhelming professional demands
  • Adapting to new roles or responsibilities
  • Confronting failure or reassessing career paths

A colleague mentioning, "I can't take on new projects—I'm going through something at work," signals professional challenges without requiring disclosure of potentially sensitive workplace dynamics.

Health situations often warrant this expression when referring to:

  • Managing a new diagnosis
  • Undergoing treatment
  • Recovering from illness or surgery
  • Dealing with chronic conditions
  • Navigating mental health challenges

For instance, "He's been quiet lately; he's going through something with his health" communicates concern while respecting medical privacy.

Personal Development and Identity

People also use this phrase during periods of:

  • Self-discovery and identity questioning
  • Value reassessment
  • Significant life transitions (parenthood, retirement)
  • Spiritual or philosophical shifts
  • Geographic relocation or cultural adjustment

The statement "I'm going through something right now—trying to figure out my next steps" effectively communicates personal evolution without premature commitment to specific outcomes.

Grief and Loss

Perhaps most poignantly, "going through something" often describes:

  • Mourning after the death of a loved one
  • Processing other significant losses (home, community, ability)
  • Adjusting to absence and new realities
  • Navigating anniversary reactions or grief triggers
  • Finding meaning after loss

The phrase "She's still going through something since her father passed" acknowledges ongoing grief while respecting that healing follows individual timelines.

Psychological Perspective: Why We Use This Expression

From a psychological standpoint, "going through something" serves several important functions in human communication and emotional processing.

Creating Emotional Boundaries

Research in interpersonal communication reveals that vague expressions like "going through something" function as boundary-setting mechanisms. A 2019 study in the Journal of Communication found that intentional ambiguity allows individuals to:

  • Control information flow about personal struggles
  • Test others' receptivity to deeper disclosure
  • Protect emotional vulnerability
  • Maintain privacy while still acknowledging difficulty

This selective disclosure represents healthy boundary maintenance rather than evasiveness.

Acknowledging Process-Oriented Healing

The phrase aligns with contemporary psychological understanding that emotional processing requires time. According to the American Psychological Association, effective coping involves moving through stages rather than bypassing difficulty.

The linguistic structure of "going through" accurately reflects this psychological reality—difficulties aren't simply problems to solve but experiences to process. This frames challenges as temporary passages rather than permanent states, which research shows promotes resilience.

Allowing Space for Uncertainty

When someone is amid significant life challenges, they often lack clarity about what they're experiencing or its ultimate resolution. "Going through something" creates linguistic space for this uncertainty, reducing pressure to categorize or resolve complex emotions prematurely.

Psychologists note that tolerating ambiguity during difficult transitions correlates with better long-term outcomes than forced certainty. By using this phrase, individuals grant themselves permission for evolving understanding.

Cultural Context and Usage Variations

Like many idiomatic expressions, "going through something" carries cultural implications that influence its usage and interpretation.

American vs. British Usage

In American English, the phrase tends toward broader application, frequently appearing in casual conversation. Americans might say "I'm going through some things right now" even for relatively minor challenges.

British English users typically reserve the expression for more significant situations, preferring understatement for lesser difficulties. A British speaker might say "bit of a rough patch" where an American might say "going through something."

Generational Differences

Younger generations have expanded this phrase's application, particularly in digital contexts. On social media platforms, abbreviated versions like "going thru it" have emerged as shorthand for emotional struggle, often paired with specific emojis to convey state of mind.

Older generations generally use the expression more sparingly and with greater privacy expectations, while younger users may employ it as part of public vulnerability and community-building.

Professional Environments

In workplace settings, "going through something" functions as a professionally acceptable way to acknowledge personal difficulties without inappropriate disclosure. It signals needed accommodation while maintaining appropriate boundaries.

Human resource professionals increasingly recognize this phrase as a potential indicator that an employee may benefit from support resources while respecting their privacy about specific circumstances.

Understanding alternative expressions provides contextual richness for interpreting "going through something" in various situations.

Similar Expressions

  • "Having a hard time": Emphasizes difficulty without the same implication of progression
  • "Dealing with some stuff": More casual, potentially minimizing the significance
  • "In the middle of something": Creates stronger boundaries around disclosure
  • "Working through issues": Suggests more active problem-solving
  • "Weathering a storm": Metaphorically emphasizes external forces and resilience

Variations That Specify Intensity

The basic phrase can be modified to communicate severity:

  • "Going through a lot": Indicates multiplicity or intensity of challenges
  • "Going through hell": Communicates extreme difficulty
  • "Going through a rough/tough patch": Suggests temporary but significant struggle
  • "Going through the motions": Indicates disconnection or automatic behavior during difficulty
  • "Going through a phase": Often minimizes the experience, suggesting transience
  • "Going through changes": Emphasizes transformation aspects
  • "Going through a process": Highlights structured progression
  • "Going through a journey": Frames the experience as potentially meaningful
  • "Going through growth": Positively reframes difficulty as developmental
  • "Going through a rite of passage": Contextualizes struggle within cultural frameworks

How to Respond When Someone Is "Going Through Something"

When someone shares they're "going through something," your response can significantly impact both your relationship and their coping process.

Effective Responses

Research on supportive communication identifies these approaches as most helpful:

  • Acknowledge without probing: "I hear you, and I'm here if you want to talk more."
  • Offer concrete assistance: "Would it help if I picked up groceries for you this week?"
  • Validate without minimizing: "That sounds really difficult. It makes sense you'd need space."
  • Respect boundaries: "I respect your privacy. Just know I'm available when and if you need support."
  • Maintain normalcy when appropriate: "I understand you're dealing with something. Would you still like our usual coffee meetup, or would you prefer a raincheck?"

Responses to Avoid

Communication research identifies these common but unhelpful responses:

  • Pushing for details: "What exactly is going on? You can tell me."
  • Comparative suffering: "Everyone's going through something. Last month, I..."
  • Premature reassurance: "Don't worry, everything will be fine!"
  • Problem-solving without invitation: "Have you tried therapy/meditation/talking to your boss?"
  • Disappearing: Complete withdrawal can signal that your relationship is conditional on ease.

Cultural Sensitivity in Responses

Different cultural backgrounds influence appropriate supportive responses:

  • In individualistic cultures, offering space and autonomy may be most appreciated
  • Collectivist cultures often value practical assistance and community involvement
  • Some cultures expect direct offers of help rather than asking "What do you need?"
  • Religious or spiritual contexts may welcome offers of prayer or spiritual support
  • Cultural norms around emotional expression impact appropriate response intensity

"Going Through Something" in Different Relationships

The meaning and implications of this phrase shift based on the relationship context in which it appears.

Romantic Relationships

When a romantic partner says they're "going through something," it often serves as:

  • A request for temporary space or adjusted expectations
  • An invitation for closer support without specific demands
  • A naming of individual struggles that affect the relationship dynamic
  • A signal that their behavior may temporarily not reflect their typical patterns
  • A request to be seen in their difficulty without requiring them to "perform" normalcy

Healthy romantic relationships can accommodate these periods while maintaining connection.

Family Dynamics

In family systems, this phrase frequently functions as:

  • A boundary-setting mechanism between generations
  • A signal for family role adjustments during crisis
  • A way for parents to acknowledge struggle without burdening children
  • An invitation for family support mobilization
  • A request for temporary accommodation of altered family participation

Families with healthy communication patterns recognize this phrase as a call for support without immediate demands for disclosure.

Friendships

Among friends, "going through something" often indicates:

  • A request for patience with reduced availability
  • An explanation for changed social patterns
  • A soft invitation for chosen friends to offer closer support
  • A way to maintain connection during personal difficulty
  • A context for potentially unusual behavior or emotional responses

Strong friendships demonstrate resilience during these periods, adapting expectations while maintaining connection.

Workplace Relationships

In professional contexts, this phrase signals:

  • A request for temporary accommodation without inappropriate disclosure
  • A professional explanation for potential performance fluctuations
  • A boundary-setting mechanism with colleagues
  • A signal that personal matters may temporarily impact work capacity
  • A way to maintain professional dignity during difficult circumstances

Emotionally intelligent workplaces recognize this phrase as an opportunity for appropriate support without invasive questioning.

Learning to Use the Expression Appropriately

For English language learners, mastering this idiomatic expression requires understanding its nuances and contextual applications.

When to Use It

This phrase is appropriate when:

  • You're experiencing significant difficulty but prefer not to detail specifics
  • You need to explain altered behavior or availability
  • You want to acknowledge struggle without dwelling on particulars
  • You're processing something not yet fully understood
  • You need simple explanation for complex emotional states

When to Avoid It

Consider alternative expressions when:

  • More directness would better serve the situation
  • The challenge is minor and doesn't warrant this relatively serious phrase
  • Professional contexts require more specific explanations
  • You're repeatedly using it to avoid necessary conversations
  • The situation demands immediate action rather than acknowledgment

Tips for English Language Learners

  • Observe native speakers' use of this phrase in various contexts
  • Notice the typical responses to understand cultural expectations
  • Practice using it in appropriate situations with trusted conversation partners
  • Pair it with appropriate non-verbal cues (tone, facial expression)
  • Learn the common variations to express different intensities

Digital Communication and "Going Through Something"

The digital revolution has transformed how this phrase functions in contemporary communication.

Social Media Context

On platforms like Instagram, Twitter, and TikTok, "going through something" or "going through it" has evolved distinct patterns:

  • Often used as a standalone caption or status update
  • Frequently paired with specific emojis that communicate emotional state
  • Sometimes employed as a form of relatable content creation
  • Used to signal reduced digital engagement or explain absence
  • Occasionally functions as an intentional invitation for support

Social media research shows that vague vulnerability often generates more supportive engagement than specific disclosures, partly explaining this phrase's popularity in digital contexts.

Texting and Messaging

In private digital communication, this expression serves as:

  • A way to pause or alter conversation expectations
  • An explanation for delayed responses
  • A text-based boundary-setting mechanism
  • A preface before deciding whether to elaborate
  • A way to maintain connection during difficulty without detailed typing

The asynchronous nature of texting makes this phrase particularly useful for managing social expectations during challenging times.

Email Communication

In professional email contexts, variations of this phrase appear as:

  • "Dealing with a personal matter" in out-of-office replies
  • "Currently navigating a situation" in deadline extension requests
  • "Experiencing circumstances" in professional explanations
  • "Managing a personal situation" in workplace communications

Professional digital communication requires more formality while retaining the core function of acknowledging difficulty without inappropriate disclosure.

Personal Growth Through Difficult Experiences

The phrase "going through something" contains implicit wisdom about the transformative potential of difficulty.

Psychological Benefits of Naming Experience

Research in emotional processing demonstrates that merely acknowledging that you're "going through something" offers psychological benefits:

  • Creates cognitive framework for understanding experience
  • Reduces feeling overwhelmed through simple categorization
  • Normalizes difficulty as part of human experience
  • Establishes psychological distance for perspective
  • Initiates the meaning-making process essential to resilience

The act of naming experience—even vaguely—initiates integration of difficult experiences.

From Challenge to Growth

Contemporary psychological research increasingly recognizes that significant challenges often catalyze growth. Studies on post-traumatic growth reveal that many people experience:

  • Enhanced personal strength
  • Deeper relationships
  • Greater appreciation for life
  • Spiritual or existential development
  • New possibilities and directions

This research supports the wisdom embedded in "going through something"—difficulty often constitutes passage rather than endpoint.

Supporting Your Own Process

When you're the one "going through something," these evidence-based approaches support healthy processing:

  • Journal about the experience without forcing premature meaning
  • Maintain routines that provide stability during uncertainty
  • Select appropriate confidants rather than universal disclosure
  • Balance acknowledgment of difficulty with engagement in life
  • Recognize that progression isn't always linear

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